tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post3850842489305767923..comments2023-08-05T06:14:28.391-07:00Comments on We Are One: Need to vent...Ruthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07083142637240943607noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-47125534983152027512012-03-22T15:06:38.955-07:002012-03-22T15:06:38.955-07:00Well saidWell saidEvanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13355215688351759230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-59954303147386696402012-03-22T09:31:39.626-07:002012-03-22T09:31:39.626-07:00Amen Laurel. :)Amen Laurel. :)Ruthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07083142637240943607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-12869724415558033192012-03-22T07:45:37.507-07:002012-03-22T07:45:37.507-07:00Face/palm... wow... NM complains about not being h...Face/palm... wow... NM complains about not being hugged... you reap what you sow... in spades.Laurel Hawkeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03146077260252479437noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-477098498255880852012-03-22T07:42:30.167-07:002012-03-22T07:42:30.167-07:00Your welcome Claire, child care takes a lot my ene...Your welcome Claire, child care takes a lot my energy. Hugs to you for choosing to spend time with your children.Ruthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07083142637240943607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-86239887644295496132012-03-22T07:36:06.137-07:002012-03-22T07:36:06.137-07:00So true. Yesterday was especially draining for me....So true. Yesterday was especially draining for me. I felt tempted to dismiss my own exhaustion at the end of the day because I hadn't "gotten anything done" - but the truth was, I was so exhausted because I did some really hard, intense emotional work with my three children, all of whom seem to have more needs this week than most weeks. So while my body didn't run around a lot and my professional work didn't get done, I did, in fact, accomplish a lot of very important work. <br /><br />We all need to recognize the work we do. Thanks for the reminder.Clairehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05574418702880244921noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-77316301030341670642012-03-22T07:24:04.332-07:002012-03-22T07:24:04.332-07:00You are right P/M it is their loss. My NM is doin...You are right P/M it is their loss. My NM is doing the same thing. Getting rid of everything. She did give me back all the gifts I gave her. But I can't give my dad any gift with out her giving it away with in the year. I solved it by giving him pictures or going to events. Shutting out grief creates such a shallow life. Thanks for sharing your experience.<br /><br />Great mini rant Ellen.Ruthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07083142637240943607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-63459376520584446702012-03-22T05:59:18.505-07:002012-03-22T05:59:18.505-07:00I like your vent Ruth. Mourning with those that mo...I like your vent Ruth. Mourning with those that mourn is a great thing to do I think, and cuddling also. Grief and sadness are a part of life. <br /><br />One thing I find very jarring about corporate life for instance is the insistence that everyone must be happy and feeling fantastic all of the time. The standard greeting is - how are you? In a booming cheerful voice. Then - Great, how are you? the expected mandatory answer. So fake. Give me a break. There, a mini rant from me to match yours. :-)Ellenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15741118126298552722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2638185360970117272.post-60045055470402546492012-03-22T05:04:14.254-07:002012-03-22T05:04:14.254-07:00I helped my cousins clean out my darling uncle'...I helped my cousins clean out my darling uncle's house after he was killed in an accident. My parents told me I would never have to do that for them as they had arranged for their house to be sealed and the contents auctioned. If I wanted any keepsakes I'd have to attend the auction and bid on them like anyone else.<br /><br />I explained that clearing out my uncle's house had given my cousins and I some closure, was part of the grieving process and the final thing I could do for my uncle. I begged them to leave me the contents of their house and deduct it from my share of the estate. This is often held up as an example of how crazy I am!<br /><br />BTW While cleaning out the house I got a keepsake for each of my parents, as my uncle was predeceased by his wife who was my NM's sister. Since both brothers were avid golfers, for NF, I got my uncle's putter. For my trouble, I was rewarded with one of NF's rages. Apparently I should have known no golfer would use another golfer's putter (which NF subsequently did) and I had deliberately hurt NF by bringing back memories of good times on the golf course!<br /><br />My aunt had held on to her mother's umbrella and I gave it to my NM which, NF said was stupid because it was so old! NM didn't bother to tell him she had asked me to get the umbrella! The umbrella and putter have since been tossed.<br /><br />No worries now, because my NPs got rid of almost everything when they sold their house and even more just lately when they moved to a retirement home. Things I might treasure have simply disappeared into the dumpster or were sent to an auction. The most hurtful was an oil portrait I painted of my younger brother when I was just thirteen years old.<br /><br />My NM puts on a show for outsiders but in private neither of my NPs seem to mourn the loss of anyone not even my older brother. They constantly speak ill of the dead and seem lack the capacity to recall any good times.<br /><br />I pity them!<br /><br />Hugs P/Mmulderfanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07500535934417551223noreply@blogger.com