Raw vs tender

This time of year is super tough for me.  From Thanksgiving through New Years are a billion triggers. (OK a billion may be exaggerating, maybe only a million.)  For the last 3 weeks I cried about something almost every day.  A little over a week ago, I was crying so hard I couldn't drive to work and called in sick.  I sent two emails to my counselor and he came across as super busy so I didn't feel like I could contact him.  Finally, talked with him last Thursday.  Again I was crying during the session.  He asked me what it was all about; I didn't know.  He asked me a series of questions trying to help me figure out why I was crying.  He asked me if I was in despair or hopeless; no to both of those.  Did I feel far away from my Heavenly Father?  No, I actually experienced several things where I feel particularly close to Him and my Savior Jesus Christ.  I feel like I am being watched over and loved from above.  I am still crying.  I explain that the crying feels different than what I experienced before.  MyCounselor pointed out that I may be grieving which is very important process and I need to go through.  I couldn't quite wrap my mind around what he was trying to say to me.  So I focused on the crying itself.  How do I feel when I am crying?  I realized what was new about the crying is my heart doesn't feel raw.  To me, feeling raw is feeling like your heart and soul has taken a beating emotionally.  Despair, hopelessness, fear, anger are all part of this raw feeling.  The crying now feels sad but hopeful, confused but not despairing, the only word I could come up with is tender.  I feel tenderhearted.  From the online dictionary I found this definition:  
easily moved to love, pity, or sorrow :  compassionate, impressionable  
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/tenderhearted
I spent many years protecting my heart and often refused to expose myself emotionally.  I avoided tenderhearted... it scared me because I felt I was so vulnerable when I am tenderhearted.  MyCounselor suggested that I am able to feel what I am feeling because I am healing and allowing myself to soften my heart.  He said a lot more stuff that I am trying to process and wrap my mind around.  I'll write more as a process what I am feeling.