Charles Schultz the creator of Charlie Brown and friends taught me early that happiness is not found where commercials says it is found. Not that new out fit or smoke or drink or latest car or top grades or all the other places trumpeted to be happiness. Another lady in my childhood days wrote a song from Henry Thoreau quote:
"Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you; but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder."
I didn't go to counseling looking for happiness. I felt it every day in small and simple things. However, I did believe that happiness came from outside of me. Made sense because inside of me was chaos, fear and darkness how could happiness survive in that hostile environment? Counseling helped me to face that chaos, fear and darkness....bring out the looming monsters to find out that they were actually much smaller than I remembered. They were big alright but I giant sized them from the perspective of my child size. Looking at memories as an adult was no walk in the park, more like a fiercely fought mud fight with goo flung and names called and hoo boy you get the general idea. Whoever said weaklings go to counseling never went to counseling. It takes courage. Willingness to say I was wrong. Openness to new ideas. For me it was a complete overhaul of a crumbled and decaying foundation hobble together to survive childhood. Clean out the rot and decay and make room for happiness to bloom and grown inside.
One of my favorite pictures I call Bloom Where you are Planted: