Sunday, November 24, 2019

Making an Angry Bird

Yup, really.  I just finished stuffing the body of a crocheted Angry Bird.  It actually looks like the picture.  (Shocker)  I am thankful for crocheting as a creative outlet that I am feeling like I can explore.  A big Thank YOU!!! to Mikey at The Crochet Crowd.  https://thecrochetcrowd.com/ He is an amazing teacher of all things crochet.  (He does knitting to but I don't knit.)  I am getting braver and trying more and more exotic stitches in his Stitch Alongs.  Thanks to my daughter for introducing me to Stitch alongs and in the process meeting Mikey online.  He has no idea who I am but that is ok because he patiently explains what to do when I make a mistake, why it is important to make test swatches, and challenges me to try new stuff.  He is one of my Super Hero people that make my life more interesting and creative.  Thank goodness for Black Friday Shopping that reduces the cost of yarn.  Interesting side note: I can't use wool yarn.  My hands start to itch like crazy.  I can pet a sheep but yarn is processed in some way that my skin reacts.  Thank goodness for amazing bamboo, cotton, and new types of soft and silky acrylics.  One of my coping techniques is crochet.  Mostly I do wash cloths that I can easily take to a waiting room, meeting, or other places that are challenging for me to hang out at. I give away my finished projects.  I release my stress and someone else enjoys the by product. 

My first stitch-a-long.  


Sunday, November 17, 2019

Not adulting

I am not adulting.  I am not doing the lists of things I should be doing.  I am playing games.  I am ignoring the should-dos in my life.  Simplest things are left undone.  I am doing great on my computer games, just adult stuff is not happening.  I hurt my back/leg/or something on the right side of my body.  I did nothing to help it get better.  I need to setup doctor appointments...not doing that either.  This is self care I should be doing....ate most of the batch of cookies in less than 24 hours.  Heavy sigh.  So what did I do?  I actually finished several projects.  Some I finished ahead of time so have time to add to the project.  I am contacting people and talking to people and included in a parent/teacher conference.  I am Peopling and that is tough.  It was fun to reassure a parent with the student sitting right their that frustration is normal for programming and we (the teacher and I) recognize the work he accomplished.  I thought after integration and counseling and all the work I've done that all this stuff would get easier.  It didn't.  I had a mini melt down and had to stay home from school just because I don't have a mailing address for Heaven so I could send Halloween cards to all my Grandkids.  It seemed so ridiculous on the surface but the reality is years later I am still grieving my little granddaughter that I only held for a moment. Grief, sadness, tears are all part of healing.  Before I started healing, I didn't feel these things.  I shut them away with joy, happiness and every other emotion.  I am not ready to adult tomorrow either but I need to go to work.  Sometimes getting up and going through the motions of living is all I can pull off.  Guess what?  That is just fine.  Feeling feelings is important work even if it requires me not being an adult for a bit. 

Finished this for my grandson....it represents the Earth with the innercore with rocks and lava and waves of water with plants on the surface, Mikey on TheCrochetCrowd.com was my teacher...