Recently I was reminded what is wrong with the constant quest for being positive. People only tell half the story. People lie to cover up problems. People deny that problems exist. Integrity is seeking the truth, the good, bad, and the ugly. Some people say it calling a Spade a Spade. I grew up this way and sadly encouraged my children to only tell me the good in their day. When my kids grew up, we had conversations of how they thought their problems were not important enough to share with me. Now I am seeing another negative thing about only focusing on the positive, people start to believe that only the positive exists. If you bring up the down side, they don't want to hear it.
Imagine for a moment that you are out looking for a house. You only look at the positive you ignore the evidence of termites or a cracked foundation or damaged roof. All expensive items if neglected. Yet people are condoning ignoring the imperfections in ourselves in the name of positivity. More than once I read people writing how messed up they were then declaring, "This is just the way I am." Really. I will be the first to agree that every person messes up some time. I am all for looking for the best in people. But dog gone it, if I go to the doctor office and complain that I have a broken leg, I don't expect the doctor to exclaim in delight that my lungs are healthy. I want my leg fixed. I am not doing myself any favors by saying that the broken leg is just the way I am.
Thorns and roses.
We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.
However, if we deny that roses have thorns we will be painfully reminded. I am an advocate of balanced integrity. Not everything is all bad and not everything is all good. There is darkness and light. A picture with out dark areas is really boring. The beauty is seeing how the dark brings out the beauty of the light. I believe that I will evaluate my behavior. Listen to feedback from others then working towards becoming my best self.
The dark water accentuates the white water bubbling up.