I follow several blogs that encourage me, strengthen me and remind me what really is most important. This morning I read Jennifer Rothchild Bye Bye Ideal me, Hello Real me.
She delightfully reminded me that my ideal images of what I should be keeps me from being my real me. I need real to remind myself I am a living, caring, changing, moody human. Too often I was told that emotions were bad, that I should squish them. So messed up, emotions are for the living and living real. However, I don't need to believe every emotion that I feel. My counselor helped me learn that some emotions are mask for other emotions. Unmasking my emotions, peaking behind anger, moving past false faces, bring me to real emotions that are messy and add all the color to my World.
I learned to sit with my emotions, hear them out, let them have their say. I learned that anger was a protecting shield for fear, hurt and frustration. When I address the fear, hurt and frustration my anger evaporates into the mist of time. But anger helped flag me down to pay attention to my inner voice that needs me to listen to myself. If I am angry because someone was rude to me, look past the anger to the hurt that they over stepped a reasonable boundary. Not OK to step on my boundaries. Think through and consider what are my options and what can I do to reaffirm I am worth protecting and caring for. It is my job to be real and care for me. Really.