Friday, October 15, 2010

Help me make it through the night...


Night... Ugh!  By the time I was 30 I was so far into sleep deprivation that the doctors didn't recognize it for what it was.  It took me several years of counseling before I understood, I hated sleeping.  In the night while sleeping is when my nightmares would be unleashed.  How do you desensitize night?  It comes every sundown.  I once dreamed of sailing in a boat as the world turned to always stay in the light.  I finally gave in and bought night lights so if I wake up, I know immediately where I am.  Light can banish my nightmares.  I still tend to stay up until I am bone, weary and as soon as my head hits the pillow I am asleep.  Six hours later I am up and going again.  This is a huge improvement from the 4 hours a night I used to do.  Top it all off I have sleep apnea.  I actually stop breathing during the night then wake up gasping for breath.  I tried treatment but it involved having a mask on face.  The third time I scratched up my face taking it off while I was still asleep, I decided that this was not going to work for me.  What to do? What to do?  I decided to redefine night and darkness.  Darkness is the darkroom so I can develop film.  Night is for awesome photographs and quiet time.  Night is when the ants go away and stop eating my kitty's food.  I am taking steps to redefine what night means to me. 


DesignZZZ Shared some beautiful night pictures.



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