Saturday, February 6, 2016

Self harming

One of the darker aspects of abuse survival is self harming.  When I was a teenager no one breathed a word about those that might be harming themselves.  Over the years, with 'Hollywood's Help', this practice came to the attention of general public.  Sometimes those that self harmed were villianized, ridiculed, or portrayed as heartless and lost.  I became more aware of the hazards of self harming as I worked toward integration.  For many years, I dissociated to escape internal pressure.  As I closed off this avenue of escape, my internal distress would hit excruciating levels.  I discovered relief when scratching my own skin.  The pain made what was internal real.  I could look at the marks and see my pain.  Then I reviewed other ways I unconsciously used to self harm.  Not eating when I was hungry, pushing myself when I am exhausted, eating foods that I know make me feel sick.  If anyone realizes that self harming is becoming a part of their life or the life of a loved, please, get professional help.  Someone that understands the outward expression of inward pain. 

Self-harming comes from a deep pain.


mulderfan said...

Before people judge they should remember that nail biting is self harm as is smoking and drinking...all considered socially acceptable!

Ruth said...

Thank you mulderfan.