Self indulgence

is not self-care.  My body is objecting to months of neglect.  I indulged in sweets and games but not self-care.  Flylady would claim that my inner-child took over my life and is squandering time and health.  One cool thing I learned was that sewing does not cause my legs to swell, sitting for long periods of time does. Sadly, I come home so exhausted from work I have little energy to do anything but sit.  I collapse into a chair and often can move until 3 or 4 hours later, sometimes, not even then.  Another cool thing I learned is I can choose healthy choices when still depressed.  I am using depression to help me feel calm when I am seething inside.  Times like this, I wish I was still in counseling and could dump all my puzzle pieces on the floor, talking non-stop until toward the end my counselor would help me pick through the rubble to work on a small piece of the mass mess.