Life Changing Events

Life’s best lessons are often learned at the worst times and from the worst mistakes. There will be times when it seems like everything that could possibly go wrong is going wrong. And you might feel like you will be stuck in this rut forever, but you won’t. When you feel like quitting, remember that sometimes things have to go very wrong before they can be right. Sometimes you have to go through the worst, to arrive at your best. — Unknown
http://positiveoutlooksblog.com/2014/04/08/worst-times-give-lifes-best-lessons/ 


Life happens.  O'Toole's corollary says that Murphy* was an optimist.  I decided to explore PTSD web pages.  A reoccurring theme is really bugging me.  Several pages I have read refers to getting on the path to where you were before the trauma happened.  To me, it is like telling everyone to be like we were before 9/11 or some other life changing event.  The power of PTSD is that it helped to survive and attempt to process horrific events.  I was diagnosed with cancer the summer before 9/11.  I had my surgery the month after.  My DH complained that cancer changed me and wanted me to be like I was before the cancer diagnosis.  Cancer and 9/11 are tied in my mind and both life changing events.  I don't hear anyone demanding that a butterfly turn back into a caterpillar.  A loaf of bread is not left on the counter so it becomes dough again.  Life changing events happen.  Sometimes a steady flow of them can feel like a shit storm.  PTSD may or may not happen as result.  I am not saying that after a life changing event a person will never be happy again.  That is just not true.  What I am saying that the reason some events are called life changing is because everything is different afterwards, even the things that make us happy.  I was delighted when I could finally use my arm again to take a gallon of milk out of the refrigerator.  Before cancer, I thought nothing of grabbing a gallon of milk.  After cancer, my first attempt all I did was keep the milk jug from shattering when it hit the floor.  I couldn't lift the milk with the side that had the surgery.  When I finally could take the milk out of the refrigerator with my left arm, I rejoiced at the milestone of regaining my strength.  I regained my strength but I no longer take for granted the simple act of taking a gallon of milk out of the refrigerator.  Life changing events are called this because we look at the world differently from then on.  A bend in the road of life with no going back to the same type of thinking.  

*Murphy's Law:  Anything that can go wrong will go wrong at the worse possible moment.