Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Maybe God needed to get your attention

I am continuing a critique of a series of statements dubbed Stupid phrases for people to say to someone in crisis.  This is the original article


http://communicatingacrossboundariesblog.com/2015/09/28/stupid-phrases-for-people-in-crisis/
  
I am going on through the list for myself, exploring why each one is less than helpful or down right harmful.  Which do I use and which were used on me?  I remember when I had cancer, someone told me that I had cancer because I hated myself.  I replied, "Then a little baby with cancer hated themselves?"  They saw the fallacy in their statement.  I am looking for the fallacies and trying to retrain myself not to use them on myself or others.  


          Maybe God needed to get your attention.

This one was used on me.  I remember feeling really puzzled by it at the time.  My first thought was God can get my attention at every sunrise.  What a miracle it is for night to turn to day.  As I ponder on this phrase I realize there is some validity to the belief of God using trauma/disasters to get peoples attention.  Through out the Bible are examples of famine, wars and natural disasters that brought people to remembrance of their Heavenly Father.  This is another one that I ask myself if I am straying from God and He needs me to turn to Him.  However, if I apply to someone else, I don't know if they spent hours on their knees in prayer and then be told they aren't paying attention to God is a massive put down to their efforts.  It is also difficult to believe that a loving Heavenly Father would choose a fist to my face to get my attention.  I do know that I am more likely to pray fervently when I am difficulty than when things are going smoothly.  I think this is one of those phrases that if I use on myself to check in with my relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ is quite different then someone else judging me on my relationship with deity.  To me this statement implies several things:
 
1.  I am doing something that God needs to get my attention.
2.  I deserve what ever is happening to me.
3.  If I was a better person these events wouldn't happen to me.
4.  I'm not humble enough and need to be smacked down.
 
These are just the things I thought of in 5 minutes when I am calm and not hurting.  The thoughts I could conjure up when I am agonizing over what is hurting me....yup, I would put this on the list to NEVER say to another person.  I need to be kinder to me too.  I can evaluate my relationship with Christ and Heavenly Father but I NEVER (that goes both past and future) deserve abuse.   





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