Thursday, November 6, 2014

Just tired

Today I figured out the source of my insomnia this week.  A meeting was cancelled and now I can sleep.  Years ago KavinCoach told me that I was just like everyone else, brought in my puzzle pieces and we tried to make sense of the picture the pieces show.  He followed the example with the comment that I was a 10,000 piece puzzle.  I knew my insomnia became much worse but I didn't realize why until after the meeting was cancelled and I started falling asleep at my computer, well before the time I usually go to bed.  So much anxiety for nothing....meeting postponed.  Once I realized what was rocking my boat, I started poking around in my emotions as to why.  Was I still upset over what the lady running the meeting said about my time log?  Nope, the teachers helped me resolve that.  Was I worried she would change my schedule again?....not really.  I learned to cope with changing what I do in the classrooms.  I finally decided that what bothers me is the negative perspective she has about teachers but I am  not in a place where I can tell the woman to be nice.  Interesting that I am having a problem with one of the classes.  The students don't see me as a teacher, just an annoying mean intruder.  I realized the students reaction to me is very similar to my reaction to the person I worked with at the meeting.  I am working at finding solutions to the students....maybe I can use those same steps to help me work with the people running the mandatory meetings.  For now....good night.

10,000 pieces

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