Years ago, I was reading a romance novel that the term 'introverted Quasimodo' was used. I always remembered it. The meant the person was beautiful on the outside and twisted and ugly on the inside. Today's culture obsesses over outward beauty. I remember years ago hearing a story about a little boy being lost. When asked for a description he described his mother as the most beautiful woman in the world. When they finally found the boy's mother frantically looking for her son she was not the 'beauty' they were expecting. Her face was plain and her clothes the same. However, to the little boy she was beautiful. This illustrated to me that what you look like on the outside doesn't matter as much as who you are on the inside. Before counseling, I thought I was an ok person with a few life challenges. However, counseling created a safe place and my mind remembered. The soul deep ugliness that tore my childhood to shreds. I wondered how I could be beautiful with so much ugliness inside. I withdrew from family and friends because I didn't want this ugliness to leak out and harm them. My first counselor described the process I would be going through of cleaning out the emotional and mental garbage out of my life. It was tough and painful. This summer I was tossed back into the cesspool. I know the process. Clean up and remove junk. I know what needs to be done. Inner peace doesn't come easily for me. It is an on going battle to leave my past behind. It keeps trying to intrude on my life again. Day by day I choose to embrace honor, kindness, gratitude, courage, and all the other emotions.
|Keeping things beautiful?|