Monday, October 14, 2013

Take Personal Responsibility

"You must take personal responsibility.
You cannot change the circumstances,
the seasons, or the wind, but 
you can change yourself."
- Jim Rohn 
 


 I have noticed that I can get quite irritated when someone tells me what I must do. It gives me the feeling that I am some how inferior and they must tell me what to do.  In this quote, I focus on the second sentence.  It is reminding me yet again that I can't change many things, not my past, not the seasons, not the wind....however, I do believe I can change my circumstances and myself.  For too many years, I accepted that my circumstances couldn't change.  My health problems seemed permanent.  I felt like my circumstances blew me around like a leaf in fall.  In changing myself, I discovered that my circumstances also change.  Changing myself, changed my perspective of my circumstances.  Changing myself altered how I interact with my circumstances.  Changing myself changes my present and my future.  I cannot change choices made by others but changing myself alters how I interact with them.

Here is a simple example.  For years my mother lectured me on loosing weight.  Please, understand these suggestions, admonitions and nagging started when I was in high school and weighed 125 lbs at 5' 4" tall.  Her obsession with weight colored my relationship with her.  Over the years, I gained quite a bit of weight.  Yes, I did have thyroid problems but I also had poor eating habits.  Over the last 5 months, I worked hard to loose quite a bit of weight.  Yesterday, my mother asked me if I lost weight...I simply replied yes.  She asked me if I felt good and again I responded yes.  I didn't justify, brag, complain, or any of the other things I used to say in an interaction with my mother about my weight.  Her questions became a complete non-issue.  I can't change my mother but the change in myself has forever altered how we interact.  I am taking responsibility for myself.  By changing me, I change everything.  

2 comments:

Evan said...

I think the problem with that kind of statement (and it is made SO often) is turning an observation into a should.

The observation being that we respond to (and so shape to some extent) our environment. This then becomes a should; yet another demand (as if we needed more).

And it gets in the way of us thinking about what we are doing and trying out stuff to see what we can do.

I guess you can tell I'm not a fan of these kinds of statements.

Ruth said...

Thanks Evan, I appreciate your insight into this statement...like you I am not a fan.