How to Change

 The first step to change is recognizing you don't like where you are.  I was spiraling down into a darker and darker place.  I hit bottom.  Started counseling.  Got the shock of my life to find out that 'bottom' was just a ledge on the way down.  Something I did not understand with counseling that things would get worse first.  I had to recognize and accept that the things done to me were evil and not my choice.  Next was turning my life around to head back out of the pit of misery I lived in.  I am still surprised at some of things that helped most were the easiest to do. 
 mulderfan's comment on yesterday's post gave it one way.

mulderfan said...
As a Buddhist, I am taught to reach out and help the person right in front of me. How different the world would be if we all did even one act of kindness each and everyday.

Here is a poem I wrote to illustrate the power of one.
"Let your voice speak.
One voice becomes a hundred.
A hundred becomes a thousand.
A thousand becomes a million.
A million becomes the world."

KavinCoach had me do a 5/50 project.  Do an act of kindness that doesn't take more than 5 minutes or cost more than 50 cents every day.  At the end of the day, write down what you did.  He had me do this for a week.  The next session he asked me what I learned.  I answered..."I need to do more to help others."   ....Fail.... The correct answer was every time I did something kind by writing it down I could say to myself, "I am a kind person when I __________."  Getting the message through to me that I was what I defined myself to be and not what my past said I was, simple yet difficult.  Now I keep doing things that take less than 5 minutes and cost less than 50 cents.  Steps of change sometimes feel small at the time but the impact is amazing when the change continues.  Changing a life is a bit like turning an aircraft carrier.  The rudder is small in comparison to the size but with steady pressure the change will happen.  When ever I tried a quick fix major change, I would find my life right back where I started.  Slow steady commitment to a better life took time and relearning how to live.  The first step was recognizing that I didn't want to be where I was and change was possible.