I enjoy the success of others

One of the fascinating things about counseling was that I learned that the way I thought was in many ways the same as everyone else.  I also learned a few quirks that were unique to me.  One of the traits that I thought most people did well was rejoice in the success of someone else.  When I worked at the university, I was thrilled to watch student after student put on Master shows and gain awards and accomplishments that I knew I would never see.  I was thrilled and happy for their successes.  Watching my own children I am so happy for them when they doing something well.  My daughter is my Zumba instructor.  She enjoys success at the studio.  I am known as her mother.  People will stop me in the parking lot and tell me what an excellent instructor she is.  I am filled with joy that she worked so hard to create enjoyable exercises for the class. Then I remind myself that this was not how I was raised.  I knew if I was given a compliment growing up that I would be 'cut' down to size with in a 24 hour period.  I especially dreaded a compliment from my dad.  If he thought I did something well, I knew I was in for being dressed down or told something that would negate his words.  After leaving home, I consciously worked to change this.  I learned that someone else's success does not make me less.  A star shines the same brightness whether in the city of the country.  In the country, you can see it better but it still shines the same way.  I learned that admiration is one of those qualities that the more you give the more there is to give.  I studied about ungames a couple of books that came out in the 70's that talked about taking the competition of playing.  I loved the goofy golf game that I played with daughters and daughter-in-law.  At the third hole, we threw away the little pencils to keep score.  We had so much fun.  We offered the group behind us to go ahead of us but they assured us that they were having fun watching us have fun.  I remember when I graduated my daughter-in-law (I like the term daughter-in-love :) ) graduated just before me.  We stood in line next to each other.  I am so proud of her and so delighted that we shared this moment together.  Her success did not make me less.  I learned that when a person needs to knock me down to make themselves feel good about themselves it is not about me.  I feel real pleasure to see someone else succeed.