Victim - Surviving - Thriving
A child has few options if their world is turned upside down and inside out. The smallest victims do things to survive that make little sense to adults. My world shattered at age 5 and I became a victim of a brutal neighbor. I survived. I excelled at surviving. I was in counseling when I was introduced to the concept of thriving. KavinCoach told me he didn't want me to just to survive but to thrive. I nodded my head, left and returned the next week to ask, "What the hell or you talking about?" I didn't know what it looked like, felt, or what a person did when they thrived. I studied desert plants. Now there is something that can survive the harshest conditions. I looked at what they did, how they grew, and how they adapted to keep growing. Many desert flowers are tiny so that the least amount of surface is exposed to the unrelenting sun. Some bloom at night when waxy white blooms open to self pollinate then close again to carry on with life. (Link to a video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=joDiVN4dHME) I started to change and adapt. I faced my past from adult perspective I learned new ways to live. I changed my point of view. I grew and strengthened through many discussions and challenges. I studied and experimented. In the first few months of counseling I read A Child Called It. I admired the author Dave Pelzer (official web page: http://www.davepelzer.com/index.html)who found his path to thriving and teaching others that they could thrive too. At an interview Dave was asked if he wished his childhood had been different, his answer astounded me, "I like the man I am today. I would not be that man without the experiences that I had." I vowed that first year of counseling that some day I could say something similar. Now I can, "I like the woman I am today. I would not be that woman without the experience that I had." I thrive.
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