Not the only one

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.

Orson Welles

This quote tickled my funny bone.  It is a great one liner but also for many a way of living.  The largest impact of integrating was the feeling of being alone.  From time to time, I miss the conversations in my head.  Differing points of view, the arguments could be endless.  Different ways to approach a problem could lead to lengthy discussions.  I take a deep breath and can still feel all their presence and a peace within that never happened until after integration.  I am alone but not lonely.  I am complete not fragmented.  I know how difficult the decision to integrate can be.  I know how huge the impact was for me.  I am not sorry I did it.   I had nightmares since I was a little girl.  I had no idea it was my mind trying to cope with the insanity in which I lived.  I had a dream that someday I would feel healthy on the inside.  I am starting to realize that the dream is now my reality.  Some dreams do come true.