I'm NOT perfect excuse

A comment on my last post I am bringing here:

Laurel Hawkes has left a new comment on your post "Perfection":
Thanks, I really needed this, this morning, as I overheard NM telling a friend on the phone that ungrateful children have unreasonable expectations of their parents, who are imperfect people and did the best they knew how. I was proud of myself for not exploding. I sent myself to my room. :-) 

Sometimes people will use the "I'm not perfect" to excuse their behavior and not take responsibility for what they can change.  Have you ever heard some one say, "Well nobody is perfect," rather than accepting responsibility for their behavior?  When I say I don't need to be perfect, I am thinking along the lines of learning that I don't need to spend 30 minutes a day cleaning the bathroom.  FLYlady's swish-n-swipe in 3 minutes is more than sufficient to keep the bathroom looking good.  However, if I have hurt someone's feelings or acted out of line shrugging my shoulders and stating "I am not perfect," to me is dodging responsibility for my actions.  Also I am fully aware that saying, "I am not perfect and did the best I knew how," needs to be considered very carefully.  How many people know doctors that smoke?  I would say that any doctor would know exactly why smoking is unhealthy, yet if they choose to smoke anyway, they are not doing the best they can.  I know as a parent, I knew I could have done better.  Many times I have felt terrible that I didn't do better.  Bottom line there are some things that I do that I truly don't know a better way of doing things.  

I try to change when I learn a better way of doing something.  When I worked at the university, I was always shocked when students would blow off a professors suggestion without considering their ideas.  Don't get me wrong, I argued with more than one professor since they are not perfect.  I also considered their perspective valuable since they were all world class artists.  Refusing to learn from others, refusing to consider what can be improved, does not constitute doing the best you can.  Refusing to learn a better way to live does not mean you tried to do your best.  I remember hearing wonderful advice from my mother which she herself did not follow.  If she can say it, why doesn't she do it?  I have problems with my weight.  I know I am not doing the best I know how when I buy German Chocolate brownies and proceed to eat it all myself. (By the way, it is really yummy.)  I know I am not doing the best I can when I know the proper diet and medication I should be taking and refuse to do it.  Taking a step back from perfectionism is taking some of the pressure off of myself.  Continuing counseling and improving how I interact with people is a goal to improve interpersonal relationships.  I may not behave perfectly and I may not always do the best I can, but I can take responsibility for my mistakes and work at improving how I treat others and myself.  Perfection is fragile and the slightest error becomes a complete fail since that makes it no longer perfect.  I prefer the grading system.  90% is still an A.  This journey to become a healthy person is a fascinating challenge and part of the process is accepting I am not perfect therefore there is room for improvement.  But that doesn't mean I can't enjoy where I am at right now.  May each of you enjoy imperfect happiness today.