Thankful for Christ

Anyone that has read my book at the bottom of the page knows that I believe Jesus Christ is my Savior.  Religion can be very triggering for a lot of abuse victims.  Sometimes religion is used to keep a victim "in-line."  Sometimes a person is haunted by the idea that they must have been bad to deserve such a severe punishment as an abusive childhood.  In the news recently, parents used the Bible as their excuse to abuse their children saying they want their children to be 'good.'  My own experience is that it has taken years for me to read the scriptures with any feeling of trust.  So why through all that I experienced I was able to say with out hesitation that I believe in Jesus Christ as my Savior?  I believe that a loving Heavenly Father sent His son to Earth to make a path for me to follow to return to Him.

Memories that I retained through out my life centered on my faith in Christ.  When I was growing up, I allowed spiders to live in my window because the did the great service of eating mosquitoes.  I was fascinated by the spider's life and web building.  The really interesting thing was that every web started with one main thread.  (If you would like to learn more about spider web strength click here.)  From this one main thread the spider will build the entire web.  My belief in Christ is a lot like that spiders thread.  It is the one firm thing in my life that has remained tough and firm.  I have built my belief system and my life from this one point; He lives.

I know people that can not comprehend how God could exist and allow such horrors as child abuse or the Holocaust to exist.  I believe that God gave man their agency and some of people are going to choose evil.  However, I look at Christ's life, he was beaten, hated, betrayed by his friends, spat on, slandered, every rotten thing you can think of happened to him.  Then He chose to take the world's sins upon himself.  I do not comprehend such an act or how it was possible.  I know from the description in the New Testament that he suffered more than anything I can imagine.  I can never kneel before him and say, "You don't understand my pain."  I believe that I can't understand His pain.  The comfort I have received from Him is not the kind of fluffy pillows and no troubles.  He even assures me that I came to this Earth to experience problems.  His assurance is a whisper to my heart that I can come through this.  His assurance is I never walk alone.  I am finally able to feel His peace, so sweet.  His peace did not come when my life was easy.  His peace came as I was struggling to creep forward just one tiny step at at time.