Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Facebook

I was headed to bed, depressed, discouraged, and worn out.  Then I remembered that my daughter had her presentation today, I checked Facebook to read her status.  She talked about her gratitude for the experience and the people she met.  I am so proud of her.  Then a couple of friends sent message conversations.  Now I feel validated, cared for, and just tired.  I'm of the opinion, if you don't like Facebook, change your friends.  I have awesome friends and my family that write encouragement, funny, and share beautiful pictures.  Tonight....I am thankful for Facebook. 

7 comments:

TR said...

That is key point you bring up. Facebook is how we want to use it. I enjoy it more that I have taken off certain friends and use it as a way to stay in touch with others. xx

jessie said...

If I could get my NM and my NMIL off, that would help me out a lot. I love being able to see my friends' pictures and read their positive status updates.
I've worked out privacy issues so that I don't have to see their stuff, but they still find ways to manipulate me on it and it makes me sad. I want to be able to use the site to connect with people and I don't want the Ns abuses to run me off.

Ruth said...

Hi Jessie,
Have you unfriended them?....there is a big difference between hiding (you don't see their posts or comments) and unfriending which you have no more contact on line. You can also start a new Facebook profile and only invite the people you want to the new profile....No contention about unfriending. There is also making lists. My kids kindly put me on a special lists that I don't see their friends stuff. It helped a lot. I was feeling like I was invading their space. Facebook can be really annoying but I am learning more and more what to do to have an upbeat friendly experience.

jessie said...

I haven't unfriended them, Ruth, as I think it would lead to issues I'm not wanting to deal with now. I tried to ignore my MIL's friend request, but she continued to request and I finally relented. (MIL was getting annoyed that her sisters and SIL could see photos of the kids but she couldn't. That's what would make it hard to start a new one; picking and choosing certain family members makes a big statement.) I do have them locked out of my page unless I choose to change the setting for an item (so that I can throw them a bone every once in awhile).
I do wish that my MIL and NM would have respect for my "private space" like you, but they don't (NM actually "stalks" around my page looking to see what I comment to OTHER people). Anywhoo, I'm working on boundaries in other areas, so I've let it go for now....

Ruth said...

Sometimes we start with baby steps. It was funny when my son-in-law posted one of those pictures that show your biggest facebook fans and he found out I liked his stuff and commented more than anyone else. I try not to stalk my kids but I do love hearing what they are doing.

jessie said...

Oh, I don't think that sounds like "stalking". That sounds interested and considerate.

My NM watches my "activity" (like that side scroll on your page that shows what people are doing). She sits on there and watches it to see what I say and to who (and then looks up their information). For example, once I had mentioned to a friend that I was leaving town - but hadn't told her - and she emailed, frantic asking where I was going. Like there is not a move I make that she isn't documenting and cataloguing on FB. It's far different than being interested and showing support ;).
But yes, baby steps. I can't fight all fronts at the same time. Sometimes I just hold onto the ground that I have ;)

Ruth said...

Thanks for the reminder that holding ground is still progress. Sorry to hear she has time to watch the stuff scroll by. Facebook just doesn't understand that there 'helping' isn't helpful. Hugs Jessie.