When we end the war we have with life our heart begins to open to everything as it is.
It's this idea of "things shouldn't be happening this way" or "they should be happening this way" that causes so many problems. We never truly accept what is occurring and continue warring on.
I learned early on with my counselor that accepting myself and where I am is key to getting my feet under me so I can move in the direction I want to go. Whenever I think about thriving I remember the line from the Cheshire Cat
Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?”
“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,” said the Cat.
“I don’t much care where–” said Alice.
“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” said the Cat.
“–so long as I get SOMEWHERE,” Alice added as an explanation.
“Oh, you’re sure to do that,” said the Cat, “if you only walk long enough.”
(Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, Chapter 6)
Some days I remind myself to keep walking....I'll eventually get somewhere.