Back to Basics

Reviewing the year in preparation for sharing my progress (or lack of) with my counselor.  Dynamic crazy year.  I experienced several bouts of illness that creamed me at crucial times when I wanted to be somewhere else.  I couldn't visit the sick and share I don't know what type of germ plaguing me.  I weathered finding out a friend wasn't a friend.  I felt sad.  Real sad.  I lost two things my belief in myself knowing what a friend is and the imaginary friend.  Not a total loss, I enjoyed time with the person but realize there were clues I ignored in my desire for friendship.  I am doing things that I wouldn't believe I could do 3 years ago.  I am growing in directions I didn't expect.  Then my legs start to swell.  Pain increases until I have to quit Karate for a couple of weeks.  DH exclaims this is worse then ever...no it isn't.  I went through this multiple times.  One time the doctor checked for blood clots....nope. Try support hose....knees swelled so much I couldn't get my blue jeans off.  Epic fail.  This time I wasn't sewing.  I stopped sewing for over a year because I thought that caused the swelling last time.  I am learning that it is a combination of events - high stress, poor eating, sitting long periods of time.  Back to basics.  Move regularly during work sessions at the computer or sewing or any other sitting project.  Remember I control every bite that goes into my mouth.  Stress....well I quit everything except my job for a couple of weeks.  Back to setting boundaries.  Back to paying attention to what I eat and how much.  Back to recognizing I can't fix the world, I can only change me.  Back to basics, back to me. 

Work in progress