Pain filled by Peace

For the last several months I knew that our newest little granddaughter was facing horrible odds.  Our doctor son let us know that her chances of living a day were slim to none.  He was right.  Our sweet tiny granddaughter lived less than an hour.  The weekend before I thought I came to terms with her brief stay on Earth.  Knowing what was coming my heart still shattered.  Unlike past experiences, I felt the pain.  I was devastated by the overwhelming effort to keep going with one foot in front of the other.  Allowing myself to mourn was part of my plan.  I cried.  Deep in mourning I felt the Comforter promised in the scriptures.  I felt the sweet whispering of peace while I felt the heartache of loss.  I ached for the sorrow of our son and daughter-in-law.  I had no words that could comfort.  I felt comforted but I don't know how to share that comfort.  I pray for them.  I weep at odd moments like finding a layette pattern for knitting baby out fits with a pink fluffy dress on the cover.  I put it away.  Again the peace promised by Christ soothed my aching heart.  I learned that peace does not deaden or numb the pain like disassociation does.  Instead it makes the pain bearable.  I am deeply thankful to those that offer support and prayers during our time of grief.  I am totally amazed the impact of one tiny life that lived less than one hour. 

Desolation