https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=rUOpqd0rQSo#!
This anchor woman shares her experience of being bullied. Bullies are on the rise...or are people finally saying enough is enough.
I grew up in an environment of bullies, by 7th grade I was becoming just like them. I bullied and hit a girl just because she was overweight. I thought it was funny. I review my behavior and feel sick. Some would say it was your age, your environment, it was blah, blah, blah. I did it. Around this time I did some things to hurt other friends. I wasn't a good friend to people. Between 7th and 8th grade I figured out I was out of line and wanted to change. Unfortunately, the girl I bullied had left the school I was at. I never had the chance to apologize for what I did. Unfortunately, all I did was change from physical to verbal violence. By high school, I refined my bullying to intense sarcasm. I prided myself and was encouraged to develop the fine art of verbal violence. As a senior in high school I worked at stopping that. I am still sarcasm-challenged; it is often the first thing that comes to mind. In college, I met a student that I went to high school after not seeing him for 2 years. He commented to me that when he first saw me, he wanted nothing to do with me. I approached him and he was amazed at the difference. I made a conscious effort to stay away from verbally and physically harming others. Then I had children. They were just amazing but I found myself snapping and snarling at these precious souls in my care. I studied and read every thing I could find about improving relationships. I tried hard but I often messed up. Counseling opened my eyes to so much that I did not know about myself. I cleared away anger, resentment, and other violence producing emotions. I used depression to manage my anger. KavinCoach and NewCounselor taught me differently, both by example and teaching. I kept changing because I wanted to be a person that my family would want to be in my company.
Enter Bully Beat Down. This is a cable television show of Bullies getting a violent form of justice. I enjoyed it way too much reminding myself once again that revenge, mob mentality, and violence hover close to the surface for me. I only watched the show once. I knew from experience that violence begets more violence. I also learned the hard way that not standing up for yourself and being a victim does not work either. I remember one of my children having problems with a bully, I taught her to fight back. I didn't know other options. I am learning more and more about other choices of nonviolent communication. (I posted this video before, I also bought his book. http://lifebegins45.wordpress.com/2012/09/06/the-basics-of-non-violent-communication-1-2/) However, there are times with some bullies fighting is all they understand. I believe part of the opportunity to be on Earth is to learn how to peacefully and kindly interact with each other.
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| Turbulent Years |
1 comment:
I don't think bullying is on the rise. Some things are not new under the sun. I'm glad insulting has become less acceptable, however. Maybe one or two victims will garner strength to get through because of that.
But bullying is insidious I didn't even realize my.parents were bullies until, oh, last year. Before then , I'd tell you I'd seldom den bullied. Even my NM thinks of me as a champion of the underdog/bullied. She just cast herself in the role of the under appreciated hat flex wanted me to champion. I was just dis-inclined.
Shinedown has a terrific ding, Bully. Shoos he an anthem. :)
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