Monday, May 14, 2012

Final Exams

Each May in schools across the United States students take final exams.  High pressure culmination of everything they learned through the year or semester.  Hoping to pass and go on to other classes or graduate.  That is how I felt for the last 3 days.  I helped chaperone a class of students to the Grand Canyon.  This was the first time since integration that I have been around anyone accept close family for an over night situation.  The week before I had melted down over a mock wedding set up that I removed myself rather than stick through the pressure.  Three days with no way to retreat.  Staying aware and willing to meet the demands of changed plans, uncertain eating, and being with other people 24/7.  Just the walking aspect of getting everyone to view points along the Rim Walk shooting pictures or drawing this stunning landscape was intimidating.  I met challenge after challenge.  I wish I could say I did it with grace but I did do it.  I hit bonus challenge when I was asked to drive the last hundred miles in a vehicle that was difficult to steer. I came home brought my stuff in the house and collapsed to sleep with out eating dinner.  Only one incident carried a tinge of PTSD reaction.  I was frustrated, angry, and upset but no one realized how I felt unless I chose to share what I was feeling.  There were some excellent highlights and frustrating lows.  I learned a lot about myself and other.  I'll share pictures and what I learned.  Overall I felt like I passed my final.

2 comments:

Laurel Hawkes said...

Whoohoo!! Good for you!!

Anonymous said...

Congratulations! I am proud of you! You are brave and tenacious. Go Ruth!!!!!